Monday, January 30, 2012

Fox News, Paul Ryan And A Birthday Cake

Yesterday was Paul Ryan's 42nd birthday. He celebrated by appearing on Fox with GOP BJ King, Chris Wallace. In a moment of supreme irony, Wallace presented Ryan with a birthday cake with a giant "$" sign emblazoned on it.

The look on Ryan's face was a symphony of queasy discomfort and anorexic panic.

Seriously, you can see the moment he realizes - as he holds the cake - this is going to be his "Mission Accomplished" moment. It will be the picture critics use for the rest of his career to describe him and his devotion to corporatist power over public interest.

He is literally dying inside...all by the hand of Fox New. Et tu Wallace? Et tu?

It is a spendiferous collision of a guy who represents the biggest of corporate money and a cake which is meant to pay homage but instead strangles him - watch his response as Wallace encourages him to have a taste.

Ryan would rather lick Wallace's balls than eat his own birthday cake.

With his obsessive workout routine and obvious eating issues, it doesn't take much imagination to picture Ryan self-flagellating at night to a picture of Ayn Rand does it? 


In other Paul Ryan news...The House expands it's list of co-sponsors in support of HR 1488, known as the STOCK Act. The bill seeks to make it illegal for members of Congress and the Senate (and their staff) to use information about the stock market they are privy to as legislators and parlay that information into savvy trades on the stock market. It seems that members of Congress are like 300% more successful in the stock market than the average person.

Lord knows they aren't 300% smarter, I mean have you met Sean Duffy? 

This kind of maneuver is generally referred to as "insider trading" and while investment managers and bankers would - and do - go to jail for it, members of Congress are immune to these same laws. Handy.

With a public approval rating of less than 11% some lawmakers decided it was time to do something their constituents might applaud - like make insider trading rules apply to a bunch of millionaires.

So, there are 250 co-sponsors of the STOCK Act, more co-sponsors than it takes to PASS the bill, but because of dick-wad Eric Cantor - he sits on it. 

Wanna know who isn't a co-sponsor? Someone who is a partner in not one, but two investment partnerships? Someone who has financial disclosure statements which indicate a comprehensive knowledge of the stock market climate?

Paul Ryan.

The GOP touts Ryan as their "financial wonk" (and his sheepskin in economics from the prestigious Miami of Ohio) and it sends a powerful message that their money guy won't co-sponsor a bill to make a law that applies to every one of his constituents apply to him as well.

A message even more powerful than a money birthday cake.