Saturday, June 16, 2012

Bad Eggs

3 bad eggs. DA Rich Chiapete,
flunky Lou D'Abbraccio and loser Van Wanggaard.
Wanna hear an interesting story? Sure you do.

Once upon a time their was a bald guy who arranged for a former magician to come to his hometown all the way from Arizona to teach people how to look for voter fraud on Election Day. The bald guy believed cheating was happening because the people who are hired to work in the polls - especially in the cities - are communists.

Luckily, the former magician was an expert on communists so he was just the right guy to tell people about the trouble communists can cause.

The magician brought with him a lady from San Diego who was an expert in teabagging - not the gay kind of teabagging - just the kind of teabagging that white middle age people do...which isn't really much fun BTW.

Anyway, the magician, the bald guy and the teabag lady had a little class in a bank while everyone else was busy with prom and a shindig out in Caledonia. They told the people how bad the poll workers are. They told the people they shouldn't eat the food in the polling place because...you never know what they might try and do to you. They told the people if they go to the bathroom they should check the locks because the bad poll workers might lock them in...they had heard stories you know.

This story is getting scary isn't it?

They told the people in the class that after the polls close - that's when the "real shenanigans" start. So the people have to be vigilant against the communist poll workers.

Election Day comes and goes and the bald guy's favorite candidate loses in a pretty close election. The bald guy is mad - no doubt the loss has something to do with communists. The bald guy hooted and hollered on Election Day, but none of the communists would listen to him. Now they had stolen the election away from his candidate.

To his "complete" surprise, one of the bald guy's friends called him and said he "found" some voting stuff in a dumpster outside one of those inner-city polling locations - it must be evidence of late night shenanigans!

Did the bald guy give it to the City Clerk in charge of elections? No.
Did he give it to the Elections Commission? No.

He gave it to the Republican Sheriff and then called the press. The Republican Sheriff called up his friend - another bald guy - the Republican District Attorney who got appointed to his new job by Scott Walker. The DA and the bald guy are board members together for the County GOP. The DA's wife gave the bald guys favorite candidate money for the election he just lost. Isn't that remarkable? They are all friends!

See, this story isn't scary after all.

The Sheriff is a Republican. The DA is a Republican. The bald guy is a Republican and they all have a Republican friend in common who just lost a very close election because of the communists.

That magician was right.

Who would have imagined that everything they said during that class held in the bank just a few weeks ago would come true? What are the odds of that happening? It's almost...like they planned it ahead of time.

Isn't it?